原版中英文对译篇-生活大爆炸(16)

在"阿凡达"里面 潘多拉星球的人做爱

Okay,in Avatar,when they have sex on Pandora,

就是把辫子结合在一起 也就是说

they hook up their ponytails,so we know their ponytails

他们的辫子就像生殖器一样

are like their junk.

对啊... 所以呢?

so?

所以 他们骑马或者骑鸟

So,when they ride horses and fly on the birds,

也是用他们的辫子

they also use their ponytails.

你到底想说什么?

What's your point?

我想说 如果我是马或者鸟

My point is,if I were a horse or a bird,

在詹姆斯·卡梅隆身旁肯定紧张死了

I'd be very nervous around James Cameron.

你真是奇怪

It amazes me how you constantly obsess

总是沉迷于一些科幻细节

over fictional details

现实生活中

when there are more important things

有更重要的事值得考虑

in the real world to worry about.

比如 为什么威廉·夏特纳

For example,why wasn't William Shatner

没有出演新的"星际迷航"呢?

in the new Star Trek movie?

嘿 Sheldon

Hey,Sheldon.

我刚才在楼上行政办公室

I was up in the administration office,

碰巧听到了

and I happened to overhear

今年科学领域

the name of the winner

校长奖得主的名字

of this year's Chancellor's Award for Science.

你是想拿我的贡献又被忽略这件事

And you want to rub my nose in the fact

来让我难堪?

that my contributions are being overlooked again?

我就是理论物理界的威廉·夏特纳

I am the William Shatner of theoretical physics.

好吧 洗耳恭听

All right,I'll play.

今年他们又把奖给了哪个

What self-important,preening fraud

自以为是 洋洋自得的骗子?

are they honoring this year?

噢 很高兴你这么问 就是你

Oh,I'm so glad you asked it like that. You.

- 我得奖了? - 你得奖了

- I won? - You won.

我得奖了!

I won!

太令人鸡冻了

This is astonishing.

倒不是因为是我得了奖... 没人比我更该得这个奖

Not that I won no one deserves it more.

其实是我说错了

Actually,I guess I misspoke.

不是鸡冻 是必然

It's not astonishing,more like inevitable.

我应该先干嘛呢

I'm not sure what to do first.

可能应该先打电话告诉我妈妈

Maybe I should call my mother.

等等! 我知道了... 我要先自我采访一下

Wait! I'm going to conduct an interview

再传到网上去

with myself and post it online.

好事啊

Well,good for him.

是啊 这个理论物理界的威廉·夏特纳

Yeah,the one thing the William Shatner

是需要再自负一点

of theoretical physics needed was an ego boost.

是不是感觉那长矛

Didn't it look like that spear

直接刺穿你的头骨?

was going to go right through your skull?

没觉得

No.

嘿 你在7-11便利店不买思乐冰饮料

Hey,you didn't want a Slurpee at 7-Eleven,

就没有3D眼镜赠品

you don't get glasses.

噢 肯定又有人打电话来祝贺我了

Oh,that will be another congratulatory call for me.

嗯 静音

Uh,mute,please.

等等 等会... 火焰箭来了

Wait,wait. flaming arrow.

你好?

Hello?

噢 Morton校长 近来可好 先生?

Oh,Chancellor Morton,how are you,sir?

是啊 我在等您的电话

Yes,I was expecting your call.

三年前

Three years ago.

我知道了

I see.

等等 如果我不发言会怎么样?

Wait. What happens if I choose not to give a speech?

嗯嗯

Uh-huh.

那如果我不想奖励被没收呢?

And if I don't want to forfeit the award?

你想的办法倒是简单

Well,you've got that tied up in a neat little bow.

好吧

All right.

谢谢了

Thank you.

出问题了

Problem.

怎么啦?

What?

他们希望我在颁奖晚会上发言

They expect me to give a speech at the banquet.

我可不会

I can't give a speech.

不是吧 你搞错了

Well,no,you're mistaken.

你整天都在发言

You give speeches all the time.

你不会的是闭嘴

What you can't do is shut up.

对啊 看电影之前

Yeah,before the movie,

你就鳄梨沙拉酱为什么变黄演讲了20分钟

you did 20 minutes on why guacamole turns brown.

它就是在你长篇大论的时候变黄的

It turned brown while you were talking.

和少数人说话我还挺自在的

I am perfectly comfortable speaking to small groups.

但是人多了我就说不出来了

I cannot speak to large crowds.

你觉得怎么样算人多?

What,to you,is a large crowd?

人多到可以踩死我就算多了

Any group big enough to trample me to death.

一般来说就是36个大人或者70个小孩

General rule of thumb is 36 adults or 70 children.

Sheldon 祝贺你啊

Sheldon,congratulations.

我从餐厅里给你带了奶酪蛋糕

Brought you a cheesecake from work.

是庆祝你获奖了

You know,'cause of your award,

不是因为餐馆工在上面打了喷嚏

not because a busboy sneezed on it.

- 我不领奖了 - 为什么?

- I'm not accepting the award. - Why not?

没想到伟大的Sheldon Cooper也会怯场吧

Turns out the great Sheldon Cooper has stage fright.

这可不是退缩的借口

That's no reason to back out.

我以前在高中也得到过一项荣誉

You know,I once got a pretty big honor

当时我也很怕

in high school,and I was terrified

在众人面前亮相

about appearing in front of a big crowd,

但是我克服了 结果呢

but I went through with it,and you know what?

作为漂亮女王团的一名成员

The world looked pretty darn good

坐在福特F-150车后头的干草堆上

sitting on a haystack in the back of a Ford F-150

我感觉世界美得不得了

as a member of the Corn Queen's court.

谢了

Thank you.

对了 我要是被提名为乡下人和平奖

Yeah,I'll bear that in mind

我肯定记住你的话

if I'm ever nominated for the Hillbilly Peace Prize.

Sheldon 你太荒谬了

Sheldon,you're being ridiculous.

我有吗?

Am I?

给你们说个故事吧

Let me tell you a story.

上哪儿去找需要的70个小孩?

Where's 70 children when you need them?

我14岁的时候以Summa cum laude从大学毕业

I was 14 and graduating summa cum laude from college.

"Summa cum laude" 是拉丁语"最高荣誉"的意思

"Summa cum laude" is Latin for "with highest honors."

我特别喜欢 你总是直接跳过

I just love how you always skip

没人发问的地方

over the part where no one asks.

我作为学生代表要致告别辞

I was valedictorian and expected to give an address.

直到现在 我都还记得当时

Even now,I can remember that moment

我走上讲台 注视人群

when I walked up to the podium and looked out at the crowd.

肯定有好几千人

There must have been thousands of people.

我的心扑通扑通直跳

My heart started pounding in my chest.

结果我呼吸过猛

I began to hyperventilate.

视线开始模糊 之后就...

My vision became blurry,and before I

噢 天哪

Oh,dear.

噢 上帝啊

Oh,my God.

Sheldon啊?

Sheldon?

Sheldon 你没事吧?

Sheldon,are you okay?

别踩着我了

Don't trample me.

得了吧 母亲大人

Come on,Mother.

你明明知道我为啥不能接受那个奖

You know why I can't accept the award.

恕我直言 我没觉得祈祷能帮上啥忙

With all due respect,I don't think praying will help.

不 我没听过"主啊 请掌控这命运之轮"这首歌

No,I have not heard the song,"Jesus,Take the Wheel."

停 停 停 停 停 停

No,no,no,no,no,no,no.

你不用给我唱

You don't need to start singing it.

是的 我自己会去iTunes下载的 母亲大人

Yes,I'll buy it on the iTunes,Mother.

再见 母亲大人

Good-bye,Mother.

你们好

Hello.

快坐下

Sit down.

我们想和你谈谈

We want to talk to you.

我犯错了吗?

Am I in trouble?

我妈给你打电话了?

Did my mother call you?

快坐吧

Just sit.

我们觉得能帮你克服怯场

We think we can help you with your stage fright.

哦 是吗

Oh,I doubt that.

我比你们都聪明

I haven't figured out a way,

但仍未想出解决方案

and I'm much smarter than all of you.

没错 但一个诸葛亮却抵不过三个臭皮匠

Yes,but you're not smarter than all of us put together.

哦 抱歉

Oh,I'm sorry.

我就是那个意思

That is what I meant.

算了 总之你的问题是

Okay. Your problem is,

你想单靠自己来解决这个问题

you're trying to do this all by yourself.

我们可以帮你 做你的后备

We can help you. We can be your team.

就像 X教授和他的X战警

Like,uh,Professor Xavier and his X-Men.

我的确喜欢X战警

I do like the X-Men.

我看过X战警吗?

Did I see X-Men?

我们上周才看过啊

Yeah,we watched it last week.

你还说你很喜欢

You said you liked it.

哦 亲爱的 我说过很多东西

Oh. I say a lot of things,sweetie.

那么 Sheldon 你觉得如何?

So,how about it,Sheldon?

不知道

I don't know.

如果你们是我的X战警 那你们有什么样的能力?

If you're my X-Men,what are your powers?

嗯 我可以带你购物

Okay. Well,I am going to take you shopping,

买套体面的西服

get you a nice suit.

为你增添信心

Might give you more confidence.

这又不是什么突变 让你能

That's not exactly a mutation that would get you

进入X教授为天赋异禀的少年而设的学校 算了 继续吧

into Xavier's School for Gifted Youngsters,but go on.

Leonard呢?

Leonard?

我能试着分析你

I thought I could try to analyze you

找出怯场的根源

and get to the root of your anxiety.

你有资格了解我的脑内结构吗?

What qualifies you to attempt to understand my mind?

我老妈是个德高望重的精神科医生

My mother is a highly regarded psychiatrist,

自从她说我过于依赖母乳后

and I've been in therapy ever since she accused me

而且我就一直在接受治疗

of breast-feeding codependently.

Raj说他能教你...

Raj says he can

叫啥名字?

What did you call it?

没明白... 反正是一些印度冥想之类的邪门偏方

I don' some Indian meditation crap.

懂了

I see.

好吧 鉴于其他人

Well,I assume,since the rest of you

的办法都不怎么高明 我假设

have set the bar so low,you're saving

你把最出彩的留着压轴

the most impressive contribution for last.

说吧 Howard

Go ahead,Howard.

给我点惊喜

Dazzle me.

我的能力就是假装

My power is the ability to pretend

不知道你有那个怪毛病

like I give a damn about your piddily-ass problems.

老兄 这可是全天候服务啊

And that's 24-seven,buddy.

我很感谢你的伪装

And I appreciate the pretense.

那么 Sheldon 你觉得如何?

So,what do you say,Sheldon?

我们足够成为你的X战警吗?

Are we your X-Men?

不行

No.

X战警是以Charles Xavier的姓氏首字母命名的

The X-Men were named for the "X" in Charles Xavier.

我叫Sheldon Cooper 自然得叫C战警(与"精液"谐音)啦

Since I am Sheldon Cooper,you will be my C-Men.

哦 这名字真瞎

Oh,that's not a good name.

好了 Sheldon

Okay,Sheldon.

我将要引领你

I'm going to be leading you

进入一系列冥想练习

through a series of meditation exercises.

这套方法源自古代印度的宗教领袖

These methods come from the ancient gurus of India

用来帮助克服自身的恐惧

and have helped me overcome my own fears.

可你到现在还不能跟女人讲话

And yet,you can't speak to women.

没错 但多谢冥想 我已经能

True,but thanks to meditation,I am able to stay

和女人们共处一室 且不会紧张到要小便

in the same room with them without urinating.

现在... 请闭上你的眼睛

close your eyes.

可以 但别打我

Okay,but don't punch me.

啥?

What?

小时候 我妹妹跟我说

When I was little,my sister would say to me,

"闭上眼睛 我给你一个惊喜"

"Close your eyes,you'll get a surprise,"

然后就打了我一拳

and then she'd punch me.

我不会打你的

I'm not going to punch you.

我妹以前也这么说

That's what my sister used to say.

你还想不想做了?

Do you want to do this or not?

抱歉 继续

I'm sorry. Proceed.

很好

All right.

想象你身处在一个地方

Imagine yourself in the one place

能让你有家的感觉

you feel most at home.

在哪儿?

Where is that?

模拟城市(热销游戏)

Sim City.

更具体地说 是我设计的模拟城市...

More specifically,the Sim City

"谢耳朵大都市"

Sheldonopolis.

好吧 你在"谢耳朵大都市"

Okay,you're in Sheldonopolis.

能否再具体点?

Where exactly?

"谢耳朵广场"? 还是"谢耳朵塔"?

Sheldon Square? Sheldon Towers?

还是"谢耳朵勇士"的大本营 "谢耳朵体育场" ?

Sheldon Stadium,home of the Fighting Sheldons?

你爱哪儿哪儿去

Whatever you like.

我还以为这是引导冥想呢

I thought this was supposed to be a guided meditation.

好吧 你在"谢耳朵广场"

Fine. You're in Sheldon Square.

真的吗? 这个时间点?

Really? This time of year?

可能会很冷啊

It's a bit nippy.

那你不会穿件毛衣

Then,put on a sweater.

那就假设我跑到商业区

Suppose I could run downtown

在"谢尔玛"(音似沃尔玛)买了些东西

and pick up something at Shel-Mart.

随便啦 快去买件毛衣就行了

Yeah,whatever. Just go buy a sweater.

知道吗 "谢尔玛"的好处就是 是我开的

You know,the nice thing about Shel-Mart is I own it,

所以我能打85折

so I get a 15% discount.

行 那个破店是你开的

You own the damn thing.

赶快去买件毛衣吧!

Just take a freaking sweater!

拜托 上一季度我获得的盈利

Look,I didn't turn a profit last quarter

可不是随便卖卖库存就能做到的

by taking product off the shelves willy-nilly.

好了

All right.

你已经买了毛衣 这会儿在"谢耳朵广场"上

You've paid for a sweater,and you're in Sheldon Square.

等下

Hang on.

我买了件开襟羊毛衫 得先把扣子扣好

It's a cardigan. I have to button it.

哦 糟了

Oh,no.

又怎么了?

What now?

一只哥斯拉模样的怪兽 走过来了

A Godzilla-like monster is approaching the city.

我要保护我的人民

I have to get my people to safety.

"谢耳朵大都市"的市民们 我是市长先生

People of Sheldonopolis,this is your mayor.

快跟我走

Follow me.

小孩们跑不动就算了 扔下吧

If the children can't run,leave them behind.

哦 原来是假想恐怖!

Oh,the simulated horror!

Raj 人呢?

Raj?

唉 早就料到了

Just as I suspected.

冥想完全就是废话连篇

Meditation is nothing but hokum.

我很怀疑你的假设

I question your premise.

一件新西服怎么能起到防止

How is a new suit going to prevent me

我在舞厅所有人面前不晕倒呢?

from passing out in front of a ballroom full of people?

它可以给你增加信心

It'll give you confidence.

每当有什么事情压得我透不过气时

You know,sometimes when I'm feeling all stressed out

我便出去逛街 买件可爱的上衣

about something,I go out and buy a cute top

或是件好玩的裙子 之后我就有了崭新的生活观

or a fun skirt and I have a whole new outlook on life.

难道你最后没发现

Don't you eventually realize

穿上可爱上衣 穿上好玩裙子后

you're just the same stressed out person

还是饱受压力困扰吗?

in a cute top or a fun skirt?

买好鞋子后我会有这种感觉

Yeah,that's when I buy shoes.

来看看 这都有些什么货

Now,let's see what we've got.

噢!

Ooh!

这件不错

This is nice.

可是单色的

It's only one color.

是的 咋了?

Yeah,so?

才一种颜色的衣服哪里值这么多钱

That's a lot of money for only one color.

好吧

Fine.

你自己挑选你喜欢的好了

Why don't you pick out what you like.

嗯

Hmm.

这件穿上挺像犀利哥的

This is pretty sharp.

像你个大头鬼

No. You're wrong.

这件太棒了

This is great.

六岁时 我有件一模一样的

I had a suit like this when I was six.

好了 这件一定可以了吧

Okay,I think we have a winner.

你从哪翻出来的这玩意?

Where the hell'd you find that?

就舞会专柜那

In the prom department.

太荒唐了

It's ridiculous.

亏你还是漂亮女王团的前成员(该团成员的着装偏好白色)

Says the former member of the Corn Queen's Court.

求你试试这件吧

Please just try this one on.

好吧

Okay.

反正我现在穿啥

But anything I put on now

你都会指责一大通

is only going to suffer in comparison.

这也太荒唐了

This is absurd.

简直就是个小丑

I look like a clown.

那么

近来可好?

how you doing?

你的心理治疗谈话 就这样开篇?

That's how you start a psychotherapy session?

"近来可好?"

"How am I doing?"

你可是承诺说 要在我的潜意识里

I was promised a riverboat journey

带我进入丛林中 开始一段河船冒险之旅

into the jungles of my subconscious.

结果你跟我说的话 与在Ralph意式餐厅

Instead,I get the same question I hear

为我切大红肠的女服务生的话是一样的

from the lady who slices my bologna at Ralph's.

抱歉 我重来

I'm sorry,I'll start again.

先诉说我做的梦的话 对你是不是有帮助?

Would it be helpful to you if I told you about my dreams?

不清楚 也许会吧

Um,I don't know,maybe.

我最近做了一个梦 我是个巨人

I recently had a dream that I was a giant.

但周围的事物 也变的无比巨大

But everything around me was to scale,

看上去没什么异常

so it all looked normal.

如果周围事物都变大的话

How did you know you were a giant

你是怎么发现自己成了巨人的?

if everything was to scale?

我穿的裤子是一百万码的

I was wearing size a million pants.

我们还是正常聊天吧?

Why don't we just talk?

好的

Ah.

纯粹的聊天

The talking cure.

经典弗洛伊德派 真好

Classical Freudian. Good choice.

如果这样有助于快点解决问题的话

If it will help speed things along,

我的标准罗夏墨迹测验(弗洛伊德的经典投射法人格测验)答案是

uh,my answers to the standard Rorschach inkblot test are

A 一只蝙蝠 B 一只蝙蝠

A) a bat,B) a bat,

C 一只蝙蝠

C) a bat,

D 我爸用皮下注射针头杀害了我妈

and D) my father killing my mother with a hypodermic needle.

还是我来说吧?

Why don't I just start?

有时候

Sometimes

人们拒绝赞扬

people have trouble accepting accolades

是因为潜意识里 觉得自己配不上

if,on a subconscious level,they don't feel they deserve them.

你有没有觉得 现在我们就是这种情况?

Do you think maybe that's what's happening here?

你说呢 Leonard?

Really,Leonard?

你是又想用阿德勒的"自卑情节"学说

You're just going to try to recycle Adler's doctrine

来忽悠我了?

of the inferiority complex?

那我还不如去找Ralph意式餐厅那位服务生呢

I could probably get that from the woman at Ralph's.

她还会让我免费试吃几块奶酪呢

And she'd let me taste some pieces of cheese for free.

但那或许就是你的结症所在

But it could be part of your problem.

我给你举个例子吧

Let me give you an example.

当我八岁的时候

When I was eight,

我做了一个叫"听古典音乐能加速菜豆的生长"的实验

I won a ribbon at the science fair

在科学展览得了奖章

for my project,"Do Lima Beans Grow Better to Classical Music."

可我妈说 那不过是

But my mother pointed out

我哥作品的老调重弹

that it was just a rehash of my brother's earlier

他的实验是 "听摇滚音乐能减缓菜豆的生长"

"Do Lima Beans Grow Worse to Rock & Roll."

我觉得很内疚 便把奖章还了回去

I felt so guilty,I gave the ribbon back.

哦 你是什么感觉呢?

And how did that make you feel?

糟透了

Terrible.

我做那个实验 花了好大力气

I worked really hard on that project.

为了等菜豆发芽

I stayed up all night singing the clown's aria from Pagliacci

我唱了一夜歌剧"丑角"中的"小丑咏叹调"

to a lima bean sprout.

继续诉说

Go on.

又不是我的错

It wasn't my fault.

我从没看过我哥的项目

I had never seen my brother's project.

我妈本可以提前告诉我

And my mother could have told me before

而不是在颁奖仪式上 当着所有人的面前

instead of at the ceremony in front of everyone.

哦 我能听出来

So,I hear you saying

你很生你妈的气

you're angry with your mother.

太对了 我是生我妈的气

Damn right,I'm angry with my mother.

看在上帝的份上 那年我才8岁

For God's sake,I was eight years old.

她当众羞辱了我

She humiliated me.

就是从那时起 我又开始尿床了

That's when the bed-wetting started again.

谢谢你 Leonard

Thank you,Leonard.

谢我什么?

For what?

如果像你这样 受过如此打击的人

If someone as damaged as you

每天都能从床上爬起来 面对生活

can find his way to crawl out of bed each morning,

那我也能应付一个简单的颁奖仪式

I think I can face a simple award ceremony.

等等 这就完了?

Wait,that's it?

我想着我们要进行一整个小时呢!

I thought we had a whole hour!

女士们先生们 晚上好

Good evening,ladies and gentlemen.

我是Leonard Hofstadter博士

My name is Dr. Leonard Hofstadter,

很荣幸能够在这里介绍本年度

and it is my very great honor to introduce the winner

总理科学奖的获奖者

of this year's Chancellor's Award for Science

我最好的朋友 Sheldon Cooper博士

and my good friend,Dr. Sheldon Cooper.

在介绍他之前

But before I do,

我想先和各位分享一封来自

I'd like to share with you a letter from Sheldon's mother,

今晚不在场的Sheldon的母亲的信

who couldn't be here tonight.

很温馨吧?

Isn't that nice?

他母亲还专门写了封信

His mother sent him a letter.

她为他而自豪

She's proud of him.

我多希望自己也能有这种经历

I wonder what that feels like.

总之

Anyway,

"亲爱的Shelly"

"Dear Shelly."

这是她对他的爱称

That's what she calls him.

这是小名

it's a pet name.

你们知道我母亲给我取的小名是什么吗?

You know what my mother's pet name for me is?

就是Leonard

Leonard.

跑题了哈

But I digress.

"亲爱的"

""

哦 天啊

Oh,dear.

怎么了?

What's the matter?

我有点儿晕了

I'm getting dizzy.

别紧张

Don't worry.

你的C战警就在你旁边

You're surrounded by your C-Men.

我不行了

I can't do this.

我要晕倒了

I'm going to faint.

给 喝点儿

Here,drink this.

会让你放松点儿

It'll relax you.

酒?

Alcohol?

我不喝酒

I don't drink alcohol.

那就算了 晕吧

Fine,faint.

没什么变化

I don't feel different.

这酒是次品

This alcohol is defective.

来 试试这个管用不

Here,see if this one works.

首先

First of all,

这两个实验完全不一样

the projects were totally different.

我是想表现出

I was showing

用古典音乐培育菜豆可以

that classical music nurtures lima beans

促进它们生长 但是我妈妈

and makes them grow,but my mother

根本不听我的

didn't hear me.

如果你们想知道

If you'd like to look at the relationship

培育和生长的关系 我要说明的是

between nurturing and growth,I'd like to point out

我哥哥足足比我高了八英寸!

that my brother is eight inches taller than me.

我准备好了

I'm ready.

喔

Oh.

好的

Right.

女士们先生们 有请我们的贵宾

Ladies and gentlemen,our guest of honor

Sheldon Cooper博士

Dr. Sheldon Cooper.

谢谢啦 小矮个 接下来就是我的时间啦

Thanks,shorty,I'll take it from here.

好的 你们想要找点儿乐子吗?

All right,you people ready to have some fun?

你们懂不懂

You have a basic

微分的基本概念?

understanding of differential calculus

有没有至少学过一年的代数拓扑?

and at least one year of algebraic topology?

好的 我要开始讲笑话了

Well,then here come the jokes.

小鸡为什么要穿麦比乌斯圈(拓扑学中的单面环)?

Why did the chicken cross the Mobius strip?

为了去同一边... 对了!

To get to the bazinga!

下一个 一个中子走进一家酒吧 问道

All right,a neutron walks into a bar and asks,

"一杯酒多钱?"

"How much for a drink?"

酒保说 "对你免费"(与"无电荷"谐音)

The bartender says,"For you,no charge."

在听吗?

Hello?

我知道你们就在那

I know you're out there.

我可以听到你们在呼进氧气

I can hear you metabolizing oxygen

呼出二氧化碳

and expelling carbon dioxide.

在座有很多学术界的权威人士

Looks like we have some academic dignitaries in the audience.

地理系的Randall博士...

Dr. Randall from the

[跟take for granted谐音]

唯一一位别人说他"花岗岩脑袋" 也很开心的少有之人

only man who's happy when they take his work for granite.

哈哈哈!

Ba-da cha!

我开地理学家的玩笑呢

I kid the geologists,of course,

只是因为我对这个领域很不屑

but it's only 'cause I have no respect for the field.

接下来我们严肃点

Let's get serious for a moment.

我们为什么会在这里?

Why are we all here?

因为我们都是科学家

'Cause we're scientists.

科学家研究什么呢?

And what do scientists study?

宇宙

The universe.

宇宙是由什么组成的呢?

And what's the universe made of?

很高兴你们问了这个问题

I am so glad you asked.

[The Element's Song 化学元素周期表歌]

* 它含有锑啊 *

* There's antimony *

* 有砷啊 铝啊 硒啊 *

* arsenic,aluminum,selenium *

* 有氢啊 氧啊 氮啊 铼啊 *

* and hydrogen and oxygen and nitrogen and rhenium *

* 还有镍啊 钕啊 镎啊 锗啊 *

* and nickel,neodymium,neptunium,germanium *

大家一起来!

Everybody!

* 有铁啊 有镅啊 *

* and iron,americium *

* 有钌啊 铀啊 铕啊 锆啊 *

* ruthenium,uranium,europium,zirconium,*

* 有镥啊 有钒啊 *

* lutetium,vanadium *

亚裔唱!

Just the Asians!

* 还有镧啊 锇啊 *

* and lanthanum and osmium *

* 有砹啊 有镭啊... *

* and astatine *

Penny Leonard啊

Penny,Leonard.

你们能不能回答我

Would you be able to answer some questions

昨晚发生了什么?

I'm having about the events of last night?

好的

Sure.

第一个问题...

我的裤子呢?

where are my pants?

你可以上YouTube看看

You might want to check YouTube.

搜什么?

What do I search?

已经缓冲好了 直接播放吧

It's already loaded. Just hit play.

好的 现在我们开始探讨数学吧

All right,people,let's get down to the math.

是三维思想

It is only three dimensional thinking

限制了我们的想象

that limits our imagination.

我能从头上把裤子脱下吗?

Can I take my pants off over my head?

当然不行

Of course not.

上身挡着呢

My body's in the way.

[视频名：物理学家斯文扫地]

但是如果可以进入更高维度

But if we had access to higher dimensions,

我们就可以通过四维

we could move our pants around our bodies

让裤子在身体周围移动

through the fourth dimension

我们就要告别脱裤子的时代了

and our days of dropping trousers would be over.

哦 天哪...

丢脸丢到家了

This couldn't be any more humiliating.

继续放

Give it a minute.

接下来

Now,for the astronomers

在座的天文学家 准备好

in the audience,get ready to see

来看看月球的另一面吧

the dark side of the moon.

[Uranus 谐音your anus菊花]

还有天王星呢

And here's Uranus.